HOW TO DO THE YAMIM NORA’IM RIGHT

THE MAIN POINT

It's nice to get together with family and friends, have a big dinner, eat apples and honey, but we need to bear in mind the main thurst of the holidays if we are to truly experience them.  The main point is teshuvah (literally: turning) or repentance.  These are the days when we need to seriously consider what we have done wrong, why we have done what we have done, why we continue to do it knowing it's wrong, and taking those measures to turn away from that wayward pattern, and start anew.

In the case of sins committed against God, we ask God for forgiveness.  In the case of sins committed against family and friends, we must ask them for forgiveness directly.  God is easy; family and friends—that's harder.  When we resist facing our failures with family and friends, we allow passion and emotion to rule our lives.  When we face those failures, we tap into a strength that is God-given and experience a very profound liberation.  We have the power to not only repair a relationship but free ourselves.  Teshuvah: that's the main point of the Yamim Nora’im.

HOW LONG ARE THE YAMIM NORA’IM?

The Yamim Nora’im begin a whole month prior to Rosh Hashanah with the last month on the Jewish calendar: Elul.  They continue through the last day of the festival of Sukkot which has a special name: Hoshanah Rabbah (pronounced:  ho-sha-NA   ra-BA).  We devote some seven weeks to the work of teshuvah.  God gives us plenty of time to do what needs to be done.

During the month of Elul, each morning except Shabbat, we blow the shofar.  Try to attend one morning service to hear the shofar blown.  The shofar reminds us that we have work to do.

SELIHOT—WHAT IS IT?

Selihot (pronounced:  si-lee-HOT) literally means “prayers of forgiveness.”  This service initiates a more intense period of self-evaluation and introspection.  We examine ourselves in the quiet of the night.  We look into ourselves for the faults that must be corrected and declare our desire to start all over.

This service takes place on the Saturday night (technically, the Sunday morning) preceding Rosh Hashanah.  If there are less than three days between that Saturday night and Rosh Hashanah, then Selihot reverts back a week.  Because the prayers are supposed to be recited in the quiet of the night, some begin them no earlier than midnight.

A READY-MADE PRE-ROSH HASHANAH TO DO LIST

• Remind the boss that you'll be missing two days of work.
• Schedule private time to ask yourself what part of your life you want to change.
• Make a Rosh Hashanah Resolutions List (helpful hint: keep it short).
• Invite family and friends to your Rosh Hashanah meals.
• Invite at least one Jewish friend who might not otherwise enjoy the festival.
• Invite at least one friend who is disconnected or alienated from his/her Jewishness.
• Make sure the refrigerator is well-stocked with apples.
• Buy two round hallot for each meal at which there is kiddush (prayer over the wine).
• Check the honey supply and if low, buy more.
• Honor someone from the family with leading the kiddush and hamotzi (prayer over the hallot).

IS THERE A CANDLE LIGHTING FOR ROSH HASHANAH?

Yes.  As with all the major Jewish holidays, we welcome in Rosh Hashanah, both the first and second night, with candle lighting.  We put a few coins in the tzedakah box before candle lighting on the first night.  Candle lighting for the first night takes place 18 minutes before sunset.  Candle lighting for the second night takes place about 42 minutes after sunset.  We light at least two candles (of the Shabbat variety) though some families light one candle for each member of the family.

The candles are first lit.  As if welcoming a long-awaited guest, make a circular motion with both hands, three times, just around the candles, and let your hands settle over your eyes, blocking the fire from your sight.  A personal meditation, recited quietly or before the family, is certainly appropriate at this time.  Then, recite the blessings.  The dates and times for the blessings are as follows:

DAY	SEPTEMBER	TIME	BLESSINGS
Friday	18	6:40 PM	1,2
Saturday*	19	7:40 PM	1,2

*The flame used to light candles on the second night must be obtained from and existing fire, like a pilot light or a candle lit before Yom Tov.  This is because on Yom Tov, we may transfer fire, but we may neither create it nor extinguish it.

BLESSING #1

,בָּרוּךְ אַתָה יְיָ, אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָוֹלָם
אֲשֶׁר קִדְּשַׂנוּ בְּמִצְוֹתָו וְצוָּנוּ להַדְלִק נֵר שֶׁל יוֹם טוֹב